she was so not down for the gang bang
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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