Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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