we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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