well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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