do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
