if you like me you must not know who I am
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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