I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
