she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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