using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
