the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
