I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I'm really busy with my period
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