Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
