When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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