we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
