just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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