is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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