really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
He shit in the fireplace
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
