Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
