like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
