i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
My life is pants optional.
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