Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
