Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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