On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
When did we convert life to cartoon?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
There's even glitter on my cock...
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