things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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