yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I am midnight drunk by noon
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize
