hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I smell like Dick and happiness
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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