I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
