Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
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