I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
