I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
this will be a night to untag.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
