well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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