he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
