The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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