I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize