Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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