Screwed.edu
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Vodka?
Forever.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
