you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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