Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Operation Purity has been aborted
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
no more duck duck goose at the bar
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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