First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Randomize
