We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Randomize