It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I wish you could order shots online.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
