bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
