all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize