She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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