That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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