whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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