in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Even my vagina gasped.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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