Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize
