so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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