Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
bring money and cleavage
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize